PW’s been writing about shoes. Funny because shoes have been on my mind for the past month. I ordered 9 pairs of shoes last month.
Why so many shoes? Well, for one, it was free shipping at Nordstrom (my favorite shoe store) and I kind of go crazy during free shipping time. I tend to order whatever suits my fancy, knowing, that I’ll most likely return all of them. Now, keep this important tidbit in mind when you read the next sentence.
So, at one point I had about $800 worth of shoes just sitting in my living room. Yeah, I know. I know. D already questioned my sanity. But, I was also at the beginning of my billing cycle and I knew I could do the all the returns before the bill hit.
My second reason for so many pairs of shoes? Well, I was on a mission. A mission to find the perfect shoes. Strike that, the perfect sexy shoes to alleviate some of this mid-life crisis or whatever it is I’m going through right now. Probably triggered by the fact that I “celebrated” my 10 year wedding anniversary.
I love my husband. I love being married. But TEN years. You know it reinforced the fact that I’m not “young” anymore. And before anyone who’s older than me start cursing me out, I didn’t mean I was old. But I’m not young either. Know what I mean?
And I know it sounds so silly, but a nice pair of sexy shoes would have gone a long way to making me feel better. Call it shoe therapy.
It all started when I saw this pair. It made my heart sing and I felt 10 years younger just looking at it.
So beautiful, it nearly brought tears to my eyes.
Then I saw the price, $665 and I really did cry. This was a beautiful, but an unattainable dream.
But I was hooked. Unfortunately, I saw “free shipping on any pair of shoes” and I was lost.
So, I searched and searched and searched and saw this:
Oooooooh… and more importantly, only $80!
Then I saw a few others that were pretty but more practical and all of sudden I had 6 pairs of shoes in my shopping cart.
So, they came and sure enough the others either didn’t fit well or they didn’t look right or I just didn’t like them.
But these platform peep-toes not only fit well, looked nice, but they were comfortable as well, all 4 3/4 inches of them. Yeah, you read that right.
So, the dilemma. Black or red? Because I am, in spite of what you may now think about my sanity, actually a pretty practical person and I knew that I couldn’t keep both. Well, that is to say, I knew I shouldn’t keep both.
For pure sex appeal, the red was hotter. And after-all I was looking for sexy shoes, right?
But, the red felt a little too sexy. A little too MILF. A little too… uh… oh heck, a little too impractical.
So, then I saw this:
I thought perfect! Still sexy, but different from the usual black and more practical than red!
I returned the red and black, along with all the other pairs of shoes to D’s heartfelt relief.
Then there was one. The neutral platform. Sexy but practical. Right? Right???
Except that I had lost my heart to the red, and I just didn’t know it yet. The neutral now felt boring.
I gave it a chance. I tripped back and forth in my living room in different outfits. I even… warning, TMI ahead… still with me? OK, I even tried prancing around in just the heels and my undies to see if I could get my sexy back. I warned ya. So, nothing. It just didn’t feel the same.
So, then there was none. Yup, I’m returning the neutral.
If you’re still with me and you want to chime in, you have until Friday. I’ll have the neutral until then. Or, if I act now, I can still re-order the red in my size. What do you think? Crazy? Should I give up? Should I find my sexy somewhere else? Should I seek actual therapy instead?